


Had To Be You

by Ohatsu



Category: South Park
Genre: Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-15
Updated: 2017-12-15
Packaged: 2019-02-14 22:50:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 4,635
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13017822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ohatsu/pseuds/Ohatsu
Summary: What might have gone through Craig's mind while coming to terms with the events of the episode Tweek x Craig.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [pearlsinherhair](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pearlsinherhair/gifts).



> This fic is dedicated to my best friend and sister. She encouraged me to write again and this is my first story in a decade.

Night was falling over the small town of South Park but one of the houses was still quite lively. The television blared with video game noises and the excited voices of two young boys could be heard talking over it. 

Craig had been at the Tweak residence since school let out. They did homework until dinnertime and only after were they allowed to play. He glanced over at the blond boy sitting next to him on the couch, Tweek was calmer than usual but still jittery. It was nice to see him able to relax and not panic about something or other. 

"Did you see that, Craig?" exclaimed Tweek. He was pointing excitedly at the television screen. Craig smiled and nodded. "I did. Good job, Tweek. I knew you could do it!" It was embarrassing for him to say things like that, but seeing those eyes light up made it well worth it. 

He wasn't entirely certain what these emotions were that were swirling around in his head. All he knew was that everything in his life suddenly revolved around Tweek. Whether it was good or bad, he hadn't made up his mind yet. The entire town's expectations weighed on him, and even their parents were pushing these two ten-year olds together. It was stressful enough for him, he wondered how it affected his partner who was always under pressure as it is. 

Mrs. Tweak peeked her head around the corner. "It's getting late, boys" she said, drying her hands on a dish towel. "Craig's parents will start to worry." Tweek gave a little sigh but they got up and started cleaning up. They walked to the door hand in hand and Craig could feel the trembling starting. That boy really needs to lay off the coffee. 

At the open doorway, Craig hesitated. He had wanted to discuss their situation but the timing never seemed right and now another night was coming to an end. Unsure of what to do, he stared at his feet awkwardly. He felt Tweek letting go of his hand and in response he gripped harder. 

Swallowing hard, he opened his mouth to speak when he heard Tweek closing the door behind him. "Craig. Thank you. I know you told me to be gay with someone else, but it didn't feel right if it wasn't with you. It will be temporary though." Craig's head shot up and the sweetly sad look on Tweek's face made his chest ache. He shook his head miserably, sputtering, "It's not like that, I'm okay with this. Really. I'm more than okay with this." As soon as he said it, he realized how it must have sounded. Like he was trying too hard. 

Tweek pulled his hand back. At this point he was shaking badly, and he had started to pull at his hair. "You said the other day this wasn't who you are. I don't know if this is me, either! You believed in me, and I made a mess of things, so now I have to fix it. We'll wait it out, we can go back to normal slowly and no one will notice. Okay?" He nodded, as if trying to convince himself. "This will work better than a public break up. And then it will all disappear like it never happened." He looked at Craig expectantly, eyes twitching. 

"Uh, yeah. Sure," he stammered. He didn't know if there was anything he could say to salvage things, and Tweek seemed to be satisfied with this conclusion. How was Craig going to say that he didn't want to break up when he didn't know himself what he wanted?

The rest of the night was a blur. He barely remembered walking home, or the conversation he had with his parents when he returned. He took a bath, brushed his teeth and pulled his pyjamas on, which included putting his blue chullo hat back on. After climbing into bed, his parents came to say goodnight and he was finally left alone with his thoughts. 

He lay awake staring wide-eyed at the ceiling. He had struggled with similar thoughts just a few days ago but now they were taking a different turn. 

What did it mean to be in a homosexual relationship? He had never questioned his sexuality before but now he found himself already in a relationship that was not of his choosing. He always assumed a cute girl would catch his eye and they might date for a bit. He might break her heart or she might break his. Then he would move on and find another girl. Not a guy. That had never been an option he considered. 

Was he even attracted to Tweek? He was considered cute by most of the girls, but could Craig look at him and see what the girls see? As much as he was allowing Tweek to get close to him, could a relationship between them work out? At least they would have a lot of similar hobbies and had the same circle of friends.

He sighed as he tossed and turned in bed. He recalled what his father recently said, that he likes gay Craig. That was reassuring because he felt he also liked himself better. He always had a harsh exterior but there was no denying that Tweek brought out a softer side to him. 

Suddenly, he had another perturbing thought that hadn't crossed his mind before. He sat up in bed, his head in his hands, and let out a frustrated groan. Tweek was currently in the mindset that they should slowly start drifting apart and they'll break things off when the coast was clear. Craig thought it was Tweek being considerate because they were pressured into this whole thing. Right now his biggest concern should be, what if he falls for Tweek but can't convince him that it's genuine before he decides he has had enough of pretending?


	2. Chapter 2

Craig sat in the cafeteria, chasing his food around on the plate with a fork. He didn't feel hungry, all he wanted was to go home and sleep. He had spent part of his morning at Mr. Mackey's office as usual and now he was expected to go out and play. He wasn't sure how he was going to get through his afternoon class. 

There was a tug on his sleeve and he looked over to see Tweek's worried face peering into his. "Oh, hi Tweek," he mumbled with a smile tugging at his lips. It probably meant something that, as tired as he was, seeing Tweek made him feel better. 

"What's wrong, Craig? You don't look so good." Rubbing his eyes, the black-haired boy turned in his seat and sighed. "I didn't sleep well last night. My eyeballs feel like I want to rip them out," he replied. "Oh no," said Tweek. "Did you stay at my house too late?" Craig frowned at him and after a few seconds Tweek realized what that might sound like to someone listening in. He looked around nervously and everyone turned away, pretending not to have heard. Innocently, he thought he was safe and sighed in relief, while Craig buried his face in his hands, wondering what kind of repercussions that question would have. 

"I got home around 9," he proclaimed a little more loudly than necessary. Tweek leaned in closer and whispered, "Did the gnomes come to steal your underpants last night?" Craig gave him a strange look then softly said "I just had weird dreams, that's all." Getting up from the table, he gathered his half eaten lunch and threw it in the garbage bin. He took Tweek's hand and they went out to the schoolyard together. 

As they walked, Craig could hear the whispering starting around them. It was aggravating. Was it anyone's business? It wasn't, so they should shut their pie holes. With his free hand, he gave everyone the finger as he passed them by. 

The pressure of Tweek's hand around his was comforting, despite the trembling. Maybe one day he can ween himself off the coffee and he wouldn't be as neurotic. Would Tweek still be himself at that point? There was surely a middle ground. 

As they approached their friends, Craig saw them casting glances at each other. They stopped kicking their ball around and gathered around him. This made him uncomfortable, were they weirded out by him and Tweek holding hands? These were the boys he played with every day. There is no way they would be judging him because of his new relationship, is there? He is still the same person he was last week. Suddenly he felt hot with anger. 

"What's going on?" he demanded. Again, the boys looked around at each other and Token finally spoke up. "Are you feeling okay?" he asked. Craig relaxed a little, he felt somewhat guilty for doubting his friends now. "Yeah, I couldn't sleep last night, but I'm fine," he replied wearily. "You don't look fine," said Clyde. "You look like shit." 

Craig rolled his eyes. "Okay, fuck off already. Pass the ball." Nobody moved.   
"S-s-seriously Craig. I th-think you should see the nurse," stuttered Jimmy. Craig stiffened. What's their problem? Was everyone against him today? Before he could retaliate, his vision blurred and he swayed on his feet. Maybe he wasn't feeling so great after all. 

Tweek, who had remained silent, shifted over so he stood in front of him. Seeing those concerned, green eyes calmed him down enough for him to reassess his situation. "Let's go see the nurse," Tweek said firmly. He reached out to touch his shoulder and Craig nodded. He was tired, moody, and he didn't want to be arguing with his friends. 

He stumbled forward, his head resting on Tweek's shoulder. Tweek wrapped his arms around him tentatively and turned away, his face beet red. This display of affection caught them off guard and everyone looked away awkwardly. "Okay, Craig. You ready to go now?" asked Tweek anxiously. He did not receive a reply. After a moment, he reached up and turned Craig's head so he could see his face. He was out cold.


	3. Chapter 3

Craig looked around slowly and realized he was laying in bed at home. It was already past midnight. This afternoon had been a total blur. He could vaguely remember being spoon-fed soup at one point. His eyes were heavy and a thick fog had settled in his head. Faint whimpering sounds caught his attention but he couldn't tell where it was coming from. He struggled to sit up and reach for the water glass on his bedside table, but he felt as if he moved in slow motion. Managing a couple sips, he finally saw that he was not alone. 

The whimpering was coming from Tweek, who had fallen asleep sprawled over Craig's legs. Even in sleep his body involuntarily jerked and twitched. Leaning forward, he gently touched Tweek's hand and he seemed to relax right away. There was something about this boy that made Craig want to get rid of all the anxieties that plagued him, and put him at ease. His gaze settled on his sleeping face, no longer contorted in worry. Hesitating briefly, he moved his hand over to touch Tweek's cheek when he heard whispers of conversation drifting up from downstairs. 

"He had a bit of fever, but he'll be okay with some rest. It's been a hard week for the boys." 

"Tell me about it. I hope my son hasn't given you too much trouble." 

"Not at all. He had dinner upstairs in Craig's room because he didn't want to leave him."

"Our sons are so gay! Business has been booming this week." 

"Umm, okay. That's good news."

"Well, I'd better get going then. Helen is worried about Tweek staying out so late."

"Yes, of course. Come on up."

When Craig realized that their fathers were coming up to his room, he flopped back down and pretended to be asleep. 

Footsteps tread softly through his doorway and he felt Tweek's weight being lifted off his numb legs. A feeling of loneliness took hold in his chest. He heard a cry of protest from the young blond boy and Mr. Tweak shushed him gently.  
"It's time to go home. You can come back to visit if it's okay with Craig's father," whispered Mr. Tweak. "Of course, Tweek can visit whenever he wants." 

Tweek mumbled something incoherently and one set of footsteps headed out of his room. Mr. Tucker stayed behind to tuck Craig's blankets back under his chin. He felt his father's hand pat his head affectionately through his hat and it made him feel safe and loved. With the sound of receding footsteps echoing in his ears, he drifted back to sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

Saturday greeted South Park with bright sunshine and birdsong. Craig rubbed his eyes and gave a big stretch. He sat for a few minutes recalling the previous day's events. He could still remember the feeling of Tweek's head in his lap. It was weird at first but not so bad. Is this a normal couples thing? Maybe Tweek will come back to visit today. That thought gave him renewed energy and he hopped out of bed. 

On wobbly legs, Craig shuffled down the hall to the bathroom. He heard his parents talking as they made breakfast, and the smell of coffee wafted through the house. Of course, coffee reminded him of Tweek. When he was done in the bathroom and made his way down the stairs, he could see that his sister was already up and watching cartoons in the living room. She had a plate of scrambled eggs and toast, just the smell of it made his stomach rumble. As she glanced up at him, he flipped her off and she returned the gesture before going back to her show. 

Thomas and Laura Tucker observed their son carefully as he climbed into his seat at the table. His plate was already prepared since Laura was going to bring it up to his room. Craig started shovelling egg into his mouth and took a big bite of toast before choking on his food. His mother rushed over to pat him on the back. "Slow down, it's not going anywhere!" she exclaimed. His father poured him a glass of orange juice and Craig gulped it down greedily. 

A few minutes later, he was done breakfast and rubbing his full stomach. His mother frowned at him. "You need to go upstairs and rest now. You were very sick yesterday, you'll get worse if you keep this up." Craig looked at her, mouth agape. "But I'm fine now. I'm going out with Tweek to play." Laura clucked her tongue at him and pointed to the stairs.

With a big sigh, Craig went back upstairs, already making plans in his head to sneak out if need be. He would never admit aloud that by the time he got back into bed he was exhausted again. Grabbing a tissue, he blew his stuffy nose just as a cough bubbled up in this throat. After he finished his coughing fit, he settled his tired little body down for a nap. 

A few hours later, Laura Tucker was sitting beside her son's bed with a bowl of chicken soup and salted crackers on a tray. Staring intently at her was Tweek, who was sitting on the bed next to the sleeping boy. 

"You want to do it this time?" coaxed Laura. Tweek started tugging at his shirt nervously. "I don't know if I can do it!"  
Laura smiled and handed him the spoon. "You saw me do it yesterday. It will be fine," she insisted. Craig's eyes fluttered open and he looked sleepily from his mother to his boyfriend.  
"Oh, perfect timing! Honey, Tweek is just about to feed you your lunch. Enjoy!" Laura got up and left the room, with Tweek staring after her with a panicked expression on his face. 

Craig sat up and blew his nose. "You're going to feed me? Dude. That's so gay," he said, sniffling. Tweek rolled his eyes irritably and thrust the spoon into the bowl. "Yeah. Well, in case you forgot, we are gay. Now open up," he demanded, determined to do the job assigned to him. A little taken aback by his assertiveness, Craig obediently opened his mouth and waited to be fed. 

Tweek approached with a spoonful of soup, shaking more and more the closer he got. "Ugh, so much pressure," he said through gritted teeth. Fearful of hot soup spilling all over him, Craig reached up and gently steadied Tweek's hand. The metal spoon rattled against his teeth anyway but he held back on the sarcastic remark he was going to make. Over time, Tweek relaxed and became more confident. 

Craig enjoyed watching him, and he was so focused on his task he did not seem to notice. Tweek's mouth would fall open as he brought the spoon to Craig's mouth, and then close again as Craig ate, mimicking him. It was rather cute to see. He even fed him the crackers, and wiped his mouth for him. Craig was feeling awfully pampered. 

When the bowl was empty, Tweek brought the tray down to the kitchen and Craig took a bathroom break. When they returned, it was fun and games. Sort of. Craig knew that his mother would freak out if they went downstairs for video games so he stayed in bed and they brought out a pack of cards and board games. 

Before long, it was dinnertime and Tweek had to go home. As fun as their afternoon had been, Craig was getting tired again and couldn't go five minutes without coughing or sneezing. "Feel better, Craig. I'll see you at school on Monday," Tweek said, as he put away the last board game. Craig had been hoping he would come back tomorrow as well. He still didn't gather enough courage to talk about what was going on between them. "Oh, I guess you're busy tomorrow. I'll see you Monday," he replied, hoping he didn't sound too disappointed. 

Tweek headed for the door and Craig watched him with what he knew was a neutral expression, and in no way showed what he was feeling inside. "Yeah, I have a long shift at work and I have to finish my report, too. It's due on Monday morning." With that, he gave a little wave and a smile and Craig was alone again. 

That hollow feeling had settled back in his chest, but he was at a complete loss as to what he should do. Tweek is a good friend but would he want to be something more? Craig wasn't sure how much his heart could take at this point. He didn't realize that his heart would beat so fast by having Tweek feed him. Something done so innocently threw his mind into turmoil. He had to have that talk with him soon.


	5. Chapter 5

It was Sunday afternoon and Craig was feeling much better. He was still sick but he convinced his father to let him take a walk before he went crazy being cooped up all weekend long. Having finished his homework in the morning, he had nothing better to do than to walk around aimlessly. He could have met up with the guys, but he was admittedly embarrassed about what had happened on Friday. Come to think of it, how did Tweek manage to ditch afternoon class when he had no real excuse? Maybe they let it slide because everyone was still supportive of them being gay. 

Before he knew it, he had crossed the playground and was standing across the street from Tweek Bros. He stuffed his hands in his pockets and tried to peer in. He could see Mr. Tweak behind the counter, and Mrs. Tweak was cleaning up tables. Tweek must be in the back room as usual. He didn't really want to go in, everyone's attention would be directed to him and to Tweek. However, he knew there was a reason he ended up here. 

As Craig deliberated, he heard familiar voices and was surprised to see Tweek walking down the street with Kenny. He couldn't make out the muffled words from that distance, but they sure made Tweek laugh. Craig's heart sunk a little. Was he jealous? That seemed ridiculous, and he knew there was nothing between those two. Kenny loved boobs too much to be gay anyway. Then again, he thought he liked women too much to be gay himself. 

As Tweek waved goodbye at the door to Tweek Bros. Coffee, clutching a white package to his chest, Kenny kept going down the street and Craig headed for the other side of town. It was mid afternoon and the weather was mild so a lot of people were out and about. People cast him curious glances, probably wondering where his other half was. He walked and walked until he ended up at Stark's Pond. He sat on a bench, watching the stillness of the water and letting it calm his troubled mind. 

If things were so complicated in his head, how would a real relationship play out? He wondered if things would be like what Stan and Wendy have. They have been so on and off over the past two years it was hard to tell where they stood at any given point. He supposed it was like having a best friend, but wanting to touch and kiss them. Craig made a face at that thought. He suddenly had a mental image of Stan and Kyle kissing. 

Still, it made sense. He recalled how he felt Friday night, watching Tweek sleep. That urge to run his fingers through the messy blond hair, to feel how soft his skin was. Maybe it was the fever affecting him. 

So why was this such a big deal? Why was it that he could never talk to him about staying together? Was he afraid of being rejected? It was kind of funny to think about when they were technically past that stage, though the thought of Tweek saying no was not funny at all. It wasn't like him to be so uncertain, to dwell on things he has no control over. The only way to clear this all up is to ask Tweek directly. 

With his mind made up, he got off the bench and made his way home. He will talk to Tweek tomorrow. It was better to lay his cards out, and see what happens. It made him feel lighter to not be playing this game of mental ping pong. Even if it isn't love, he knew he felt something for Tweek that he hadn't felt before. He now knew he was willing to fight to win him over, and that's all he really needed to begin with.


	6. Chapter 6

Craig was on his best behaviour. He did not want to be sent to the counsellor's office, and risk losing his focus. His heartbeat felt too fast and erratic, it didn't help that he was still recovering from being sick. There was an uneasiness in the pit of his stomach as he counted down the minutes until recess. As soon as the bell rang, he scrambled out of his seat and ran out the door. 

Tweek was at his locker and he smiled when he saw Craig. The dark-haired boy felt his heart beat faster, blurting out, "We need to talk. Right now." At this, Tweek looked dismayed and he started trembling. That was never a good thing to hear. He closed his locker quickly as Craig grabbed his hand and pulled him out to the schoolyard. 

Standing in a quiet corner, they stared at each other, both a bundle of nerves. Tweek started tugging at his hair, waiting for his boyfriend to say something. Craig, suddenly losing his composure, clenched his hands by his sides and willed the right words to come out of his mouth. Tweek's panicked screaming snapped him out of his thoughts. "Oh my god, what is it? I can't take this! What do you need to say?" he shrieked. 

Everyone in the schoolyard turned to see what the commotion was as Craig grappled with Tweek to stop him from pulling out his hair. "Calm down. I'm sorry, I'm just trying to figure out how to say this." Tweek scowled and pushed his hands away. "You can't do that! You came running, and said we need to talk. Now you won't talk, and you want me to be calm. That's not how it works! Ahhh!" 

He was right. For all of Tweek's neuroses and how utterly disheveled he was, he was making more sense than Craig did and that thought made him chuckle. The look on Tweek's face was so indignant, however, that it made him feel guilty and he pulled himself together. He grasped Tweek's hands and held them firmly, even as the other boy tried to pull away. 

"Tweek. Will you be my boyfriend?" asked Craig solemnly. Tweek stopped struggling and looked at him with a mixture of confusion and surprise. He went on to clarify, "I don't mean pretend, to keep everyone happy. Because I don't care what everyone thinks. I care about us. Will you give us a chance?"

Tweek's face softened to relief, and then back to worry. "But, you said you're not gay. I didn't think I was, but I - I kind of liked spending all this time with you," he murmured. "I thought that we could go back to being friends, but every time I thought about it, I just felt so lonely." 

Craig gave Tweek's hands a reassuring squeeze and smiled at him. "Then you understand. It's not about whether we think we are gay. It's about what makes us happy. I like you, Tweek. I want to be with you because it makes me happy. So I guess that makes me gay." As Craig spoke, he understood how much his mind had been made up without him even realizing it. 

He watched as a range of emotions flitted across Tweek's face. He tugged on one of his hands to get his attention. "What makes you happy?" he asked gently. He didn't want to pressure him into giving the answer he wanted to hear, but he knew recess wasn't going to last much longer. He glanced across the yard and saw Clyde hold up two fingers. There were only two minutes left until the bell rings.

Tweek drew a long, shuddering breath. His eyes were teary and he looked away, as if too nervous to face him. "That day, when you told me to be gay with someone else, I said alright, but I knew it could only be you. I was so happy when you came for me, and held out your hand. I thought, even if it's just for show, if we could just stay like this for a while..." he trailed off, his voice sounding pinched with emotion. 

Suddenly he laughed. "I tried to be brave when I told you we could go back to normal. I didn't want to hold you back from getting chicks because everyone thinks you're gay." Craig let go of one of Tweek's hands and turned his face so he could look straight at him. "I don't want chicks. I want you," he said seriously. 

Tweek pulled his other hand back and started tugging nervously at his shirt. "You make me happy, Craig. I want to be with you too!" He looked panicked, as if it was wrong to say that, and started trembling. Craig smiled, all was right in his world again, and held his hand out as the bell rang. 

"Come on, babe. Let's get back to class."


End file.
